I remember what the M2s were saying during orientation week-- about how if you get behind, you'll stay behind. Well, they were right. Having my aunt die during the cardiovascular section was not only incredibly sad, it has also proven very difficult to come back from at school.
So far, I've had to take my cardiovascular practical exam with less preparation than I would have liked. Then I took my pulmonary exam. Then, a week later, I took my cardiovascular exam, which I had to study for while sacrificing class time for the lower limb, which was started while I was taking a week to study for CV. Now I have the Lower Limb exam on Friday and am NOT prepared.
The majority of the information is going to be about blood and immunity for classroom topics. Then the practical will consist of the same things the upper limb included... so a whole bunch of vessels and muscles. Honestly, I would rather anything but musculoskeletal.
I guess what I'm really getting at is this is going to absolutely destroy me on Friday. I have faith that my studying these next few days will pick me up... but I don't know how much. I'm so behind with my personal problems that have interfered with school. It's very frustrating and time-consuming and makes me wonder if I'm going to pass at all. And, no, that's not whiny overdramatic Hayley. That's legitimate concern. And that's way scarier.
Guess I should get back to the review in which I'm sitting. I have no idea what they're talking about, but I should probably try to at least take something from it.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Creative Influx
I feel like I become the most creative when I have responsibilities that should be my main focus. I have a makeup exam tomorrow over the cardiovascular system. I have been studying since early this morning. I feel like the break I have been taking for the past couple hours is deserved... but deserving something and having it be a good idea are two completely different things.
Since I have been surfing the web in a procrastinating manner, I have found many things I want to do: make a puff quilt, start an etsy store for my illustrations, quit medical school and write children's books, apply for an Arkansas Governor's School faculty position to teach mathematics, bake various things for Christmas, write a novel, design my own home (again), improve my watercolor skills, and the list really goes on and on...
Sitting here, realizing one day I'll likely become a doctor, I'm seeing more and more how lacking in creativity the medical profession is. Creativity leads to lawsuits. The most I could hope for would be opening a pediatric clinic of my own and hanging my own artwork inside it. Hooray... not.
There was a time when I wanted the whimsy with which I see the world to be available to anyone who would look for it. And I still long for it. I wish more than anything I could share my visions with other people. I still want to write, illustrate, and publish a children's book in my lifetime. I still want to design my own home. I still want to save lives. Reconciling these desires is impossible, especially in the present. Maybe this summer I'll open my own etsy store, make some money painting more murals, do something amazingly creative with my life. Saving lives sounds fulfilling, but this artist inside me is going a little crazy.
Since I have been surfing the web in a procrastinating manner, I have found many things I want to do: make a puff quilt, start an etsy store for my illustrations, quit medical school and write children's books, apply for an Arkansas Governor's School faculty position to teach mathematics, bake various things for Christmas, write a novel, design my own home (again), improve my watercolor skills, and the list really goes on and on...
Sitting here, realizing one day I'll likely become a doctor, I'm seeing more and more how lacking in creativity the medical profession is. Creativity leads to lawsuits. The most I could hope for would be opening a pediatric clinic of my own and hanging my own artwork inside it. Hooray... not.
There was a time when I wanted the whimsy with which I see the world to be available to anyone who would look for it. And I still long for it. I wish more than anything I could share my visions with other people. I still want to write, illustrate, and publish a children's book in my lifetime. I still want to design my own home. I still want to save lives. Reconciling these desires is impossible, especially in the present. Maybe this summer I'll open my own etsy store, make some money painting more murals, do something amazingly creative with my life. Saving lives sounds fulfilling, but this artist inside me is going a little crazy.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Engaged
For anyone who knows me very well at all, I love a good project. And, more often than not, I like them as distractions from the things I actually need to be doing. Getting engaged was perfect for me during med school. Planning a wedding when I should be studying is seriously right up my alley.
Fortunately for my time management, Dad wants to do most of the planning. I am in charge of making it all cohesive. Putting that art degree to good use, I suppose. As of right now I have my wedding website set up through The Knot. We have a date set for June 2. We've chosen our colors (and an aesthetic), and I have my invitations designed (on draft 3 right now). I have a guest list going through preliminary checks with the parents. I have a photographer lined out (Drew's fabulous sister!). I have a venue-- my dad's land in Hot Springs. I have an idea for the Save-the-Date postcards, just waiting to get those going with Abbie.
Right now, the only things I haven't mentioned are the flowers and the cake. The flowers are going to be all made of paper (origami!!!), so I'll be my own florist, in a way. The cake is an issue though. I need to talk to the people at Ambrosia Bakery in Hot Springs to see if they can do what I'm wanting. If not, I'm afraid I'll have to go to the Blue Cake in Little Rock. They are really fabulous, but they charge a boatload for transporting cakes out of Little Rock. Hopefully Ambrosia will pull through *fingers crossed*
Okay, so, here's our wedding website:
http://hayleydrew.ourwedding.com/
That gives a pretty good idea of the theme and the colors. The invitations to a better job, but when you're working with only a few templates on a wedding website, it's really hard to get something exactly the way you want it. I toyed with some larger paid websites, but I was disappointed generally. And I lost my money on those, but oh well. The Knot is the way to go.
For now, I need to get back to studying. But... so far, so grand!
Fortunately for my time management, Dad wants to do most of the planning. I am in charge of making it all cohesive. Putting that art degree to good use, I suppose. As of right now I have my wedding website set up through The Knot. We have a date set for June 2. We've chosen our colors (and an aesthetic), and I have my invitations designed (on draft 3 right now). I have a guest list going through preliminary checks with the parents. I have a photographer lined out (Drew's fabulous sister!). I have a venue-- my dad's land in Hot Springs. I have an idea for the Save-the-Date postcards, just waiting to get those going with Abbie.
Right now, the only things I haven't mentioned are the flowers and the cake. The flowers are going to be all made of paper (origami!!!), so I'll be my own florist, in a way. The cake is an issue though. I need to talk to the people at Ambrosia Bakery in Hot Springs to see if they can do what I'm wanting. If not, I'm afraid I'll have to go to the Blue Cake in Little Rock. They are really fabulous, but they charge a boatload for transporting cakes out of Little Rock. Hopefully Ambrosia will pull through *fingers crossed*
Okay, so, here's our wedding website:
http://hayleydrew.ourwedding.com/
That gives a pretty good idea of the theme and the colors. The invitations to a better job, but when you're working with only a few templates on a wedding website, it's really hard to get something exactly the way you want it. I toyed with some larger paid websites, but I was disappointed generally. And I lost my money on those, but oh well. The Knot is the way to go.
For now, I need to get back to studying. But... so far, so grand!
Ugh
I'm not sure how that's even relevant. My mind is going numb from studying pressure relationships in the lungs. Also, I realized how long it has been since I blogged and it has made me really sad.
Knowing myself, I'll end up posting things about my engagement and wedding planning on here. Should be interesting. For now, we'll stick with the funny video... and I'm going to get back to freaking out over medical school nonsense.
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